Manhattan Adult Entertainment: Bankers Furious After Bonuses Accidentally Directed to Haiti
… I’ve never heard anyone crying like that, poor old beggar, he needs his Aston Martin and Lamborghini serviced next month. Where the fuck is he going to get the money for it?” Joel Hemmingwart, a senior analyst who did receive his bonus this year told the FT.
This is a terrible time for the bankers involved and some are so distraught that they didn’t even attend a bonus party at a sleazy London strip joint last night.
“Usually this time of year we hire a jet and fly off to Corfu for a day trip of golf, sea and sex with high class escorts. I’ve just been told that £800,000 of my bonus was wired to some tin pot shack in Haiti. Those people don’t know the first thing about caviar, shagging prostitutes and champagne! If I have to fly over there myself and pry my money out of their dying hands god help me I will,” another disgusted banker was quoted as saying by the FT.